Looking at your pictures made it seem less real at first. It was like
you were there when I could see a picture and remember the day. I could
remember how happy we were, and everyone who was there at the time. I
could remember something funny you might have said at the moment it was
being taken, even. Those pictures were all very real, and comforting to
me at first. Tonight, I looked at your pictures and it didn't do that
for me. I couldn't feel the times we had. It seemed like a life time
ago, and it hurt most to realize it was a lifetime ago. Your lifetime. I
didn't realize how long it had been since those pictures were what my
life consisted of. I looked at you, and me, and all the people I never
see anymore, and hated that it had to be you. Maybe that's selfish to
admit, but there are so many people in those pictures, and in this
world, for it to have been you. Somone so young and valuable. All life
has value, but you could have been so much. You were so much. Looking at
your pictures tonight made your death more real than it ever was
before. I don't know why, but tonight when I looked at your pictures all
I could see was all that was lost. We didn't just loose you, we lost
the times we'll never recreate, and memories that are becoming harder to
picture. With you died a part of my life that won't ever be the same,
and tonight the part of me that hoped it could possibly be the same
died, too.
You're in my thoughts,
And all around me
You're in the water,
When I feel small by the ocean
You're in the sand,
Slipping through my fingers
You're in my garden,
A sunflower standing tall
You're in the sky,
When I look to God
You're in my tears,
When I cry for all that's lost
You're in my heart,
Everyday
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